Hi, I'm Zinta!

I'm a dating coach for women and AFAB folks who feel insecure, anxious, and over-worked in dating and tend to make bad picks or get stuck in situationships.

I'm trained in psychotherapy and somatic relationship coaching.

I used to get so anxious and confused about dating.

I’d get excited about someone I met, would start to imagine a future together, and then would get anxious and upset when they were constantly "too busy" to meet up, took too long to respond, or ghosted me altogether. 💔

I didn’t understand what I was doing wrong.

I kept thinking—I'm doing everything I can, and they seemed really into me for a while, so what the heck is going on?

I thought I needed to try harder.

Be more patient.

Chill out.

Something!

Anything!!!!!

(Can you sense the desperation?)

I thought it was on me to do the “right things” to get a date to realize I would be the best partner for them.

Like the time I tried to date the dude I had a huge crush on in high school (15 years later, tyvm).

He had told me I was his secret crush in high school.

Whaaaat! I couldn't believe it.

Back then, I was a nerdy weirdo with major social anxiety. But apparently this dude who I thought was sooo cool liked me anyway.

I thought it was a sign to pursue him. So I did, relentlessly.

It was like my inner teenage "weirdo" took over. Part of me believed that if he became my partner, my insecurities would go away.

My feelings of being an outsider, unworthy, or not enough, would go away.

I would be whole, my history of feeling socially awkward and different completely wiped away.

The thought that this was my last chance at love (and getting rid of all this emotional baggage) took over.

That insecure part of me needed this "relationship" to work.

That part of me believed that being chosen by this guy would make me lovable and whole.

So I poured everything I could into the intense hope I had for this tiny whisper of a possibly-maybe potential relationship.

And it almost destroyed me, because he was NOT having it.

He might have been into me, but not in the way I wanted.

He didn't want a relationship with me, even though he was GREAT at making me think he did. 🤦

(Or maybe I just heard what I wanted to hear, and blocked out the voice inside me that was telling me his words weren't enough.)

And it took me so much anxiety, heartache, and bargaining with the universe (and my own mental health) to realize it.

That's what I want to help you avoid.

Because now I can see between the lines of the boxes your date ticks off for you.📋

Even if they're hot and great at charming your pants off, there's way more to creating the dreamiest, safest-feeling relationship ever.

The kind of relationship where you can be your full self, messy feelings and all, and be embraced with love and care.

Through my training and experience as a therapist, and healing my own anxious attachment, I know what it takes to date more calmly and build the best relationship of your life.